Student Quotes Year Two, Round Two

Happy Tuesday! And happy first official day of ... winter? I'm not sure how the weather is where you live, but it's about 80 degrees with 100% humidity here in Houston. Ideal Christmas weather, no?

But this guy found some Christmas spirit on our morning walk

But before this toasty Tuesday wraps up, I want to wrap up my third semester of teaching with yet another round of student quotes. I'm constantly reminded how funny high schoolers are, and though my students drove me up the wall these last few weeks, I also thank my lucky stars that I've got the very best job around. So, here's a little bit of lighthearted reading to enjoy on this Tuesday evening.

Your essay has me feeling some type of way

Number 2

Again, number 2

They love that candy jar

Great start to your essay

10. Student: "Miss T, you know how I can come to you for anything, right?"
Me: "Right."
Student: "Well, Kobe's retiring and ... he's my favorite player!"
As sad as I am to hear that one of the greats is retiring from the NBA, there's really not much I can do to help you with that one.
9. Last week was rough. Really rough. My students were ready for a break, I was ready for a break, but we still have final exams. In making them do their final exam reviews, one student asked me "Why I gotta have so much attitude," while another told me that "I was getting on [his] nerves." Sue me for making them do the work that is going to help them in the long run.
8. We were reading an article that talked about voting. I asked my students if they were going to vote when they became old enough. One student's response? "I'm not going to vote" ... "I'm going to BE the president." I hope you do, and I hope you remember me when you're in th White House.
7. We were reading The Odyssey, and we came to the end when we learn of Penelope's 100% faithfulness to her husband. And we can't say the same about Odysseus. But one student calls out, "Man, I need to find a girl like Penelope." That you do, sir.
6. We were FIFTEEN weeks into the semester. I've only been writing on the board all year. As I'm writing something on the board a student calls out, "Miss T, how long have you been left-handed?" #observant, right?
5. In my Reading classes, I gave my students a couple of days to catch up on missing assignments in all of their classes. A student asked me to give her all of her missing assignments, so I asked her to check GradeSpeed and tell me what she's missing. Her response? "Can you look? GradeSpeed be makin' me sad lately." Me too. Me too.
4. Again, in my Reading classes, we were doing a mini-research assignment. One of the events that could be researched was the assassination of Abraham Lincoln. I was sitting with a group of students so that they would remain on task, and one student turns around and asks me, "Wasn't it John Doe who killed Abraham Lincoln?" At least the John part was right.
3. We were reading a story that mentioned The Flying Dutchman. I asked if any of them knew what that was and, "DUH, Miss T. It was in an episode of Spongebob!" I mean, DUH.
2. I'm not entirely sure how this one came about, but I'm standing up at the front of the room when a student says to me, "You need to have kids; you're going to be a live mom." I honestly doubt that, but I'll take the compliment.
1. And the number one quote has to be when a student came to my room for lunch tutorials. She had quite a bit of make-up work to finish due to being absent from school a couple of days. In all seriousness she turns to me and asks, "Can I have your number? I need help. We can FaceTime." In your wildest dreams.

And then you can't forget the time a student calls out, "Miss! There's a roach!" And I literally jumped on top of a desk only to see that it was a miniscule insect crawling across the floor. One of my finer moments, that's for sure.

And that's all I've got for you guys today. Hopefully I can check back in with you guys tomorrow. Three sleeps to Christmas!

Student Quotes: Year Two, Round One

It's a Monday. And Mondays can be tougher than other days, sometimes, so I hope this post will brighten your day. I'm going into this week with a positive attitude because I had one fantastic weekend. Perfect weather, a lot of volleyball, a lazy Sunday spent watching football, a not-so-lazy Sunday evening spent running 12 miles, and it was just a weekend where I was left feeling revived. So, even though my alarm clock went off nice and early this morning, I have no complaints. Because I love my job and I'm ready to rock out another week. The first week of the second cycle, so here's to hoping my students start out with a bang.

I'll take lots of number 16, and minimal number 17

Anyway, it's no secret that high schoolers are "endlessly entertaining," to take a line from Mr. Teacher's book, and they make going to work every day so worth it. It's hard to ever be in a bad mood (okay, maybe that's taking it a little bit far) when you're interacting with 15-year-olds every day. They make me laugh every day, and I have yet to give up my habit of writing down some of the funnier lines. So, without further ado, here's the first cycle's top 10.

Technically, she's right ...

10. Channel 13 was at school the other day doing a feature on a student who scored a perfect score on both the SAT and the ACT. No big deal, right? Anyway, one of my students comes back from the bathroom and announces to my quiet class of 34 that the news is right down the hall. Another student immediately stands up and starts walking toward the door. When I point him right back toward his seat he attempted to persuade me by saying, "I'm just try'na get famous. Come on, we can sing and dance out there." Sorry, but I think you'll have more success with your Pearl station work.
9. It's the end of the six weeks, so that means my students are on top of me about updating their grades in the gradebook. And I'm typically on top of my grading, however, I tend to be a bit more lackadaisical when it comes to late work. I told a student that I didn't grade the night before because I went out to dinner with some friends. His response? "That's nice; most teachers don't have lives." He's right, you know. We all just sleep at school. It's one big sleepover every single night.
8. We were discussing adverbs one day, and I asked the students, "Instead of slowly, what's another word for how someone ran?" One student confidently shouts out, "Fastly!" Even he couldn't contain his laughter once he realized what he had said.
7. A student was borrowing a book from me, and I have them initial and date next to the title of the book. One of my students came up to me and said, "I borrowed one of your pens, and it wouldn't work." Well, that's because it's wite-out, my dear.
6. New bonus question: How do you spell your teacher's last name?

5. Within the first few weeks of school, there is a lot of student movement. One day, a student is in your class, and the next, they're gone. It's always interesting to hear how students describe a teacher when they don't know his or her name, and I learned that multiple students seem to think I have blonde hair. In that case, I guess I better make a trip to the DPS and change what's listed on my driver's license.
4. We read Suzanne Collins' The Hunger Games for our summer reading, and while we don't spend as much class time in English 1 walking through the plot and the characters, I am able to do that in my reading class. We were discussing what it says about Katniss that she volunteered as tribute for her younger sister, and if there was anyone they would volunteer for. One darling student announces, "I would volunteer as tribute for you any day, Ms. T." I'm flattered, really.
3. It was probably the second week of school when a student asked for a pencil. I directed him to the front of the room where I have my stash of student-use pencils. Sidenote: My plan to retain all student-use pencils has not panned out the way I'd hoped. Anyway, he then told me that, "I must be a young teacher because the older teachers don't ever give us pencils or anything like that." Noted.
2. I asked a student why she wasn't in class the day prior. Her response? "Well, it was my birthday, so I didn't come to school." Oh, that's how it works! I guess I won't be at school on February 5th.
1. And because no list would be complete without this conversation taking place - I was sitting on a bench doing some grading in the main hallway after volleyball practice just last week. Because I was too worn out to walk up to my room on the third floor. Anyway, one of my students walked by, informing me that he had finished his This I Believe essay. One of his friends stops, stares at me in disbelief, and says, "You're a teacher? Wow! I thought you were a student!" Never heard that one before.

We haven't talked about conclusions quite yet

The newest ocean

And with that, I'm off to school. Have a fabulous Monday! I hope yours is as laughter-filled as mine is sure to be. I believe it was Friday afternoon when a teacher told me, "Life is too short to not do what you love." And I wholeheartedly agree. I love my job, even if I do have to personally escort former students back to their 7th period class sometimes.

Student Quotes V

Last week, I was feeling sentimental about the last few weeks of school. I almost didn't want to say goodbye to my freshmen, because for the most part, they've grown on me. I've come to love them, and I truly enjoy waking up each morning and coming to work. This week, however, is a whole other story. I left school on Tuesday fuming, and simply feeling thankful that 7th period is the last class of the day, because I surely could not have faced another class after that one. The kids are starting to get restless, which I get, but if there's any time that they need to be paying attention, it's now, because so many of their grades are resting on the final exam. That being said, some of my students have continued to do good work, or at the very least, they've done their work. Which is more than I can say for others.

One of my most reluctant students took the time to draw this for his advertisement project

Picking up hot chicks - quite the selling point

10. Okay, this one didn't actually come from any of my students. They are the Pre-AP students of the teacher with whom I share a classroom. They were in the classroom during lunch, discussing a project they were required to complete. They all started throwing out ideas, but they realized they were going to have a hard time finding a time when they could all get together and work. One excitedly said, "We can Google-hangout!" If that doesn't epitomize this generation, I don't know what does.
9. It's hard to read Romeo and Juliet without talking about the ... sexual innuendos. They're prevalent throughout the entire play, and unlike me when I was a freshman in high school, my students are all over them. Mercutio, in particular, is one dirty, dirty boy. When I asked my students to pick a character for whom they would create tweets, one student asked, "Who's that dude that's always making them sex jokes? I want to be him!"
8. Reading Romeo and Juliet aloud absolutely crashed and burned with my academic freshman. The one day I had them act out the parts was the first and last day I had them do that. Instead, I have opted to show the play version of Romeo and Juliet, featuring Orlando Bloom as Romeo. I told the class, "Romeo is played by Orlando Bloom." A student asked, "Oh, that's like Corbin Blue from High School Musical, right?" Maybe I need to work on my enunciation.
7. I told one of my students to work on his warm-up, and that doesn't mean taking selfies on SnapChat. One astounded student asked, "How do YOU know about SnapChat?" One student came to my rescue(?) saying, "It's not like she's 80 years old."
6. One student was shocked that Romeo died for Juliet, scoffing, "Ugh, I would never die for a female." This was also the student who waltzed in one Monday bragging that he saw 50 Shades of Grey with one girl on each arm.
5. We are beginning to review for the vocabulary portion of our final exam, and one of our vocabulary words is trespass. In giving them an example of trespassing, I asked them if they had ever toilet papered anyone's house when they were younger. I received a very honest response: "Only white people did that, Miss." Fair enough. Sometimes I wonder why our parents let us waste perfectly good toilet paper.
4. We've been reading Romeo and Juliet for at least the past three weeks of school, and we talked about it even before that. Just the other day I had a student ask me, "What's Romeo and Juliet? I was only here Thursday of last week." Maybe if you stayed awake long enough to know that we started reading it much before last week.
3. As I mentioned above, we had the students come up with tweets from the perspective of a character in Romeo and Juliet. Prior to assigning this project, we had a whole discussion about Twitter. That was probably the most engaged some of them have been all year. Anyway, I asked, "What's the difference between Twitter and Instagram?" I was looking for something about words vs. images, but I got, "Old people use Instagram." Noted.
2. I'm not sure if you are aware, but evidently our own Waka Flocka Flame is planning to run for President. I was once again reminded why we have a voting age (although, none of my students are likely to pull a Breakfast Club), when a student asked, "Miss, are you going to vote for Waka Flocka Flame?" I'm counting down the days, really.
1. Remember when Ebola was a thing? It used to be the talk of the school, but it's not as common to hear an Ebola reference these days. So I couldn't help but (probably inappropriately) laugh when a student showed me a picture and said, "When bae has Ebola, but you still love her." That's commitment if I've ever heard it.

I mean, good try though

And in addition to a slew of student quotes, I've got a whole note on my phone dedicated to hilarious teacher quotes. Because we've been in state testing mode this past month or so, I've been able to spend some extended time with different groups of teachers as we savor our time spent away from the excitement that is watching kids bubble in answers on a scantron. The good news is that the people I work with are absolutely hilarious. They are some of the most genuine people I have ever met, and though I don't love state testing, I'll look on the bright side and remain thankful that I got the opportunity to spend some extended time with some of my third-floor family. They're much cooler than I originally gave them credit for. But I'm not sure all of the teacher quotes I've collected are fitnessandfroyo appropriate, so I'll save those for the Twitter world.

Be sure and check back tomorrow for another round of Things I'm Loving! 

Student Quotes IV

Happy Thursday! Phew, we've (almost) made it. I was talking with another teacher today about how both this week and the week before spring break have been the L-O-N-G-E-S-T weeks of this entire school year. The week before spring break speaks for itself, but this week is due to the fact that the STAAR test is now ONE school day away. One. I was feeling relaxed this week until the middle of 7th period, when I was explaining something about the test to my students and I felt my chest tighten. It suddenly occurred to me that my students are going to be taking this test all by themselves, with no hints or tips from me. They won't even have my presence. I feel like they're my little chickadees, and I'm sending them out into the world on their own, to fend for themselves. Of course, they are more than capable, but shoot, who's motivation and energy wouldn't decrease during the course of a five-hour exam? I realize that we, as adults, often sit through exams of that length, or exams that are even longer. However, these are 14- and 15-year-olds. Enough said. Anyway, I thought today would be the perfect time for another rendition of student quotes. I've got some good ones, so please enjoy!

Group Short Answer Response practice

10. The students have become accustomed to completing a grammar warm-up each week. Each day we focus on a different grammar rule, and the students do a mini check for understanding. One of my students was standing just outside the door, long after the bell had rung.
Me: "Student, please get inside the room and get started on your warm-up."
Student: "I'm too cute to do the warm-up."
Oh, okay. If that's the case, I shouldn't have had to do any of my work, huh? I'm kidding, of course!
9. I was asking my students what they did over spring break, and a lot of them told me they went to the carnival. They were referring to the rodeo carnival, so I asked them if they had attended any of the concerts. A couple said that they had, and at one point Luke Bryan came up. A student so kindly reminded me that, "Everyone basic went to Luke Bryan." I didn't see him perform, so I guess I escaped that title. For now, anyway.
8. One of my students, whom I have the pleasure of having in class twice a day, and who sleeps much of both classes, walked tall and proud into seventh period, announcing that "[he was] going to do his work today because education is important." I was a bit taken aback, and a lot proud, but then 25 minutes later that same student was playing a game on his cell phone. Hey, at least I had him for half the class!
7. One of my students was absent one day, and the next day I asked him where he had been. He told me, "If it's cold and rainy, I don't go to school." I see your reasoning, kid, and I wish I could follow suit.
6. I gave my students an assignment with about 15 minutes left in class, and when I gave this student a look for having nothing written on her paper when the bell rang, she said, "Oh, I was about to start writing, but then my pencil ran out of lead." And you just now noticed. Right.
5. It was the beginning of March when a student walked into my class and said, "Miss, it's my first time to see my textbooks." Well, that explains a lot.
4. Going off of that, another student walks into the room and said, "You know what's funny, Miss? I carry more make-up than books in my backpack." Again, that explains a lot.
3. Monday is the English department exam day at Bellaire. One of my students had her phone on her desk and I could tell that she wasn't looking up any of the answers or anything of that nature (besides, it was an open-book test), but I still wanted her to put the phone away and focus on her test. When I asked her to put the phone away she said, "Sorry, I was looking at pictures of food." Well when you put it that way ....
2. I was forced to write two students up one day when they were yelling profanities at one another and "hitting" one another and just acting very childish despite my repeated attempts to get them to sit down. Here's how a conversation with one of my students went the next day:
Student: "I know you wrote me up, and that was very childish."
Me (feeling proud that she was owning up to what she did): "What you did?"
Student: "No, writing me up."
Pride revoked.
1. In the expository essay, students are required to provide an example or two to support their thesis statement. We advise them to use examples from history, (personal) experience, literature, or pop culture - HELP (and trust me, they need it). However, in reading through their mock STAAR essays, I saw that many students were confusing some of their facts. Today I advised them not to use an example if they don't know the facts, because that won't prove to the readers that they're educated and deserving of a passing score. The example I gave was, "Barack Obama is NOT our 51st president. We have not had 51 presidents." One student said, "Yeah, he's our 54th!" I wasn't even sure how to respond.

And one more for good measure. Because I had some good ones to choose from this round. Going off of what student quote number one, I was also giving them some other pitfalls to avoid in their essays. A lot of students tend to use slang, or text language - gonna, wanna, cuz, tho, YOLO (seriously), and so on. I told them that "ain't" isn't a word, and it's one they should absolutely avoid using in their essays. I received quite a bit of pushback on that one, and one student even tried to argue that maybe the STAAR graders would be okay with them using ain't in their essays because we live in Texas. Try it, and let me know how it goes, y'all.

Just please do good. (Source)

And have a great rest of your Thursday! I know I'm going to get my belongings together for Lost Pines, and then settle in on the couch and watch March Madness. Sounds like a good night to me!

Student Quotes III

I love my students. I really, really do. When they walk in and say, "Hi, Miss," or ask me how I'm doing or tell me to have a good weekend, and ask me about my personal life, I love it. I feel like I'm someone important to them. And maybe I'm just another adult who tells them what to do on a regular basis, but because they make my days so much brighter, I can only hope that I do the same for them. That being said, I know I have my moments. Because teaching is hard and interacting with 100+ 15-year-olds on a daily basis is challenging. Just take a moment to think back to what you were like at 14 and 15. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. 

M*A*S*H Memorial

You're welcome for that. And just the other night I was thinking back to my own teachers. How they, my calculus and physics teachers in particular, gave up their quiet morning time to help struggling students like myself. Okay, struggling might be too strong of a word, but AP Calculus and AP Physics did not come easy to me. I really had to work for the grades that I got. And as someone who now teaches, and who purposely gets to school more than an hour before the bell rings so that I can have a moment to myself and get my things together and make copies and scarf down breakfast, I can't help but be grateful for all of that time they gave up to help me. As I have mentioned in an earlier post, so many of my teachers have made such a difference in my life, and even when my students frustrate the ever-living heck out of me, I can't help but think back to my teachers. And though I was maybe, a different student than the students I'm working with, at the end of the day they're still kids, just like I was.

But even with all of that being said, they still say the darndest things, and as usual, I make sure to take the time to write them down. So, here's another rendition of Student Quotes.

Wise beyond his years

It wasn't

10. This isn't a quote, persay, but the other week I had to pull two students out into the hall and talk to them about how their excessive flirting was becoming a distraction to the rest of the class. I didn't use those exact words, but honestly, I kind of hope their flirting turns into something. Young love developing in my very classroom. Well, not my classroom, but you catch my drift.
9. I think I've mentioned this before, but in my reading classes, I give my kids 15 minutes of silent reading time, during which they can read any book they please. One of my kids was staring at his cell phone, so I asked him to please get a book. His response?
"I am reading a book ...
Facebook."
Okay, you got me on that one!
8. On my birthday, the following conversation ensued:
Student: "Miss, you're only 23? Why are you a teacher?"
Me: "I have to work!"
Student: "But you should be a bartender or something!"
Yeah, because that will pay the bills (actually...). Okay, I know I don't have any bills. But still.
7.  Many of these quotes came from my birthday, of which the kids took full advantage. A student asked me, "Miss, what year were you born? 1889?"
Excuse me, sir, but who is your math teacher?
6. A kid learned it was my birthday, whips out his cell phone and says, "Hold up Miss, I'm gonna order some mariachis for you."
5. This one came a couple of days before my birthday, when a student informed me that he was going to bring me strippers for my birthday. Just in case you were wondering, it didn't happen.
4. Every Friday in reading, I give my kids a combination vocabulary, spelling, reading comprehension, and revising and editing quiz. It's pretty standard that my students have Chick-Fil-A in my 1st period, as Bellaire sells Chick-Fil-A breakfast on Friday mornings. One of my students got some of his breakfast on his quiz, proceeded to lick it off, and then hand it in to me. Thanks.
3. In a reference to my last Student Quotes post, one of my sweet students in 7th period struts out the door, calling out over his shoulder, "Alright Ms. T, stay gucci!"
2. One of my students from last semester comes and visits me every morning before 1st period. It's become a ritual, and I get a little sad on those mornings when he's running late for school and doesn't stop by. One morning he says to me, "Miss, you know how I know a girl is desperate? She hits you up on Facebook." Noted. I wonder if it's the same for guys?
1. I've also mentioned that I have some students twice a day. I wasn't sure how I would like that, but I really do. I almost feel protective over these students, and they are some of my most well-behaved students. So, one student was there for 1st period, but he was missing from 7th. The next morning, when I asked him where he had been, he told me he was at the park because his dog died. When I started to express my condolences he laughs and says, "Nah, Miss, I'm just playin'. I went to the doctor." Kids these days. 

One of my students gave me a Valentine's Day present

And one more for good measure. Today I was talking about singular indefinite pronouns, and I just about blew my students' minds when I told them that everyone, neither, and either are singular indefinite pronouns, and therefore the pronoun his (or her), as opposed to their, would be paired with it. One of my students blurted out, "But you're wrong! That don't make sense!" You're right. It don't, but that's just the way it goes.

And I'm not sure I ever talked about where this idea came from. As an English teacher, I must give credit where credit is due. In order to protect his identity, one of my teachers had (and still has) a Twitter account under the alias of @MrTeacher. If you don't follow it, you should. He tweets the hilarious and nonsensical things his students say, and it was my high school goal to make his Twitter. I made it once upon a time, talking about Snuggies, of all things. Remind me to tell you about Snuggie Day in another post. But that opened my eyes to how hilarious high schoolers really are. Thus, Student Quotes was born.